Even though some may consider co-parenting a myth or something that they can’t possibly achieve, it is much better if they keep their children in mind when thinking about it.
Unless you’ve faced serious issues that led to your divorce, then joint custody is something you and every other parent should aim for. In fact, divorce attorneys, besides handling your divorce, will also determine whether the parents are fit to co-parent if needed.
Since we know that fresh co-parents can have a hard time dealing with this new world, here are some tips that will prove more than just helpful on your new journey!
Communication as a Team
While co-parenting, you two will reach a disagreement or two. Don’t worry, as this is entirely normal! However, keep in mind that you should be working as a team and, therefore, solve any issues/ disagreements as one, too.
Moreover, if there’s something that you need to argue about, do it in a neutral place and not near your children. The key to communication in co-parenting is to treat each other with respect and never get personal!
Be Open and Flexible
While you may have a parenting calendar that’s ordered by your court, it is important to put the needs of your children first. On top of that, never argue about meetings and schedules in front of them.
Overall, please keep your schedule mostly open and flexible – especially if you really want to be a part of the whole co-parenting thing.
Set Your Feelings Aside
As mentioned above, the children should always come first – remember this at all times! If you understand and apply this, then you’ll also know that any feelings that you have for your ex, especially anger and hurt, should be set aside.
Don’t let them influence the way you grow and educate your children. Healthy co-parenting is focused solely on the children and shouldn’t be affected by the disputes of the co-parents.
Don’t Ignore the Co-Parent
Still, it would be best if you didn’t ignore your ex, either. For example, birthdays or certain holidays should be taken into account and treated as such. Why? Because children might get embarrassed if something doesn’t happen as it should in a family. For example, if you bring them to their Mother’s Day and you – or they – don’t have a present for your ex.
Difficult Times Require Support
Even though it may be hard for you to admit it, you’ll have to go through some challenging times while co-parenting. In such cases, it is important to remember that, just as with any married couple, you still have your mutual friends or family to support you.
On the other hand, you may also rely on a trusted religious leader of your community for advice or on a really good friend that can help both of you.
The Bottom Line
While co-parenting can be quite difficult, you shouldn’t avoid being part of it, especially if you want to be a part of your children’s life.
As such, make sure to apply the tips above, as well as any other helpful tips that you come across. If you do so, you’ll see that it doesn’t matter if you’re married or divorced as long as your child is your main focus!